Me oh my, my dear Montana sky, I think maybe I’ve missed you.
The clouds dance here, though it is no dance I’ve ever seen before, across a sapphire blue sky, east to west.
We chase after things of this world because we are told by this world it is what we are supposed to do, but as Watchman Nee points out, all things of this kosmos, even with the intentions of being good are from the tree of knowledge. James further points out in the end of his letter that despite us thinking this life is ours, it is really what the Lord wills, a bitter pill for our humanity to swallow but a sweet sigh of relief for our souls.
Somewhere along the line, at a tree in a garden, we as woman bought the lie that our one perfect and true love is somewhere on this earth; that, that person who can make our dreams come true, love us selflessly, meet our every need and desire, that, that person is of this earth, this kosmos. We have somehow deluded ourselves to believe whole heartedly that something on this earth, a result of the great divorce, could possibly be what our eternal souls crave and need.
How ridiculously unfair have we been to the men of this world, fallen creatures just as us, fruits plucked from a tree we had no business with to begin with. How quick we are to blame them for our un-happiness, when it is our own fault for loving the wrong One.
Daily I forget it and daily I beat myself for it, getting stuck in the endless, woe is me mentality. Wishing for the “better” life, wishing for a “different” life, with nothing left but my sticky pride, keeping me from turning, from all things of this earth that fade and feasting my eyes upon my true north star, the hope of the earth, lover of my soul and keeper of my heart.
Is there one true love for everyone? Yes, but you will never find him on this terrestrial ball. You must starve your eyes of all things to see Him and be in the silence to hear Him and sit in the night to know His touch upon your heart. For he is a jealous lover, he will not stand for other things or other people to come before him, but oh, how he loves.
My One true love
Comforts in the night
Is the healer of all sorrow
Sees me & knows me & wants to be known
My One true love
Has chased me since I was born
Has relentlessly pursued my heart
To make it His own
However, I like Hosea’s wife, have turned away time and time again, thinking I have found something more true and more real than the creator of the universe.
Yet he says,
I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy. I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the Lord.